Wasting my time (and yours) writing about whatever's funny.

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Around-the-World Honeymoon Trip, and Paulspond Retires3/29/1419,133
Google Transcribe3/3/1419,048
Picture Catchups2/20/1419,250
"The man-made lake on my campus looks like a guy taking a dump"1/29/1419,070
Computers, Computers12/14/1319,046
News - Year In Review11/30/13107
Long Live the Civic11/2/1357
"Sharkmuffin" and other Awesome Band Names10/26/1366
Gabe & Diana’s Wedding: Shot O'Clock10/15/1371
Mini-Honeymoon: Panama10/11/1365
Our Wedding10/3/1355
Tiff & Ken's Wedding: Eating Seafood While Fish Watch Us9/3/1372
Football Fans8/27/1352
German8/20/1369
Porter Ridge Road8/12/1362
Ilana & Richard’s Wedding: Biking Off Into the Sunset7/24/1354
Greg & Ashley's Wedding: Denver Botanical Gardens7/17/1378
Sarah & Scott's Wedding: Cabo7/10/1391
Sam & Angie's Wedding: The Madonna Fantasuites6/28/13100
White People Music6/25/1375
Lost Love6/12/1369
Kimmy & Rob's Wedding: Our Own Little Vegas Hotel5/7/1380
Summer & Tony's Wedding: I'm on a Boat!4/13/1376
Kasey the Baby-Stealer4/4/1366
Junk Car3/27/1365
Gender Coverage3/3/1364
The Year of 13 Weddings2/5/1380
Happy New Year!1/3/1352
Modern Medicine12/21/1264
Baby, as Long as The World Is Ending...12/17/1277
Duck Dynasty11/23/1257
4th of July Pictures (LONG overdue)11/20/1277
The Most Ridiculous Action Movie Ever11/17/1252
Actual Food11/11/1266
Election11/7/1246
A Fat Naked Guy Being Chased by a Hippo9/7/12931
Super Spacemobile8/18/1264
50 State Stereotypes, 2 Million Views7/20/1251
Florence Fight Club6/30/1254
Venice Photo Tour 25/12/1284
Moving!4/30/1243
6 Things Hitler Ruined (besides half of Europe)4/19/12221
Snatch3/31/1254
Picture Catch Up2/19/1248
4 Interpretations for Heart's "All I Wanna Do Is Make Love To You"1/28/12821
IAWTV Awards1/11/1253
Happier News12/30/1170
Sad News12/28/1156
Freddie Wong: Flower Warfare12/26/11512
Hobbes's Chat Roulette12/17/1155
The Great State War12/8/1155
Thanksgiving Pictures (though not like you'd expect)12/1/1175
Breakfast Rappers11/1/1197
GLEE Season 3: Ep 1 RECAP – Purple Piano People Eaters10/22/11111
Gaga or Trash is back!10/4/1140
A**hole Monkey9/30/1153
8 Unfortunately-Placed Price Stickers7/19/1191
Chris Brown Helps You Dump a Girl7/10/1143
8 More Appropriate State Anagrams7/4/11134
South Carolina Anagrams7/1/1179
12 More Overdramatic Road Signs6/28/1191
Six Fascinating Historical Ironies6/20/11283
Book Signing6/17/1181
11 Points Wants You To Hook Up6/8/1195
"States of Confusion" on MSNBC!6/6/11636
State Stereotypes - The Rejects6/3/11872
50 State Stereotypes in 2 Minutes5/27/111,921
State Stereotypes - Help me vote!5/24/1162
How NOT To Jump A Car5/13/11122
"States of Confusion" Lives5/10/1148
Swimming With Snakes5/5/1172
5 Bad Ideas Humanity Is Sticking With Out of Habit - #7: Right-Side Driving4/30/11104
5 Bad Ideas Humanity Is Sticking With Out of Habit - #6: The Electoral College4/25/1198
States of Confusion Book Trailer is up!4/15/1173
New Huffpo Article: 6 Things I Learned on the Fast Track Detox Diet4/12/1176
Terror Baby4/6/1176
WNBA Dunk3/28/1150
My New Favorite Way Vegas Is Trying to Beat the Recession3/21/1181
NCAA Tournament + St. Patty's Day + Vegas = Trouble3/16/1170
Dead Fish Tide3/10/1199
Hit and Rearview3/8/1187
'Lady Gaga Outfit or Landfill Trash?' Iphone App!3/4/1159
Expired Shampoo2/27/11122
If Ski Maps Were Accurate2/25/1167
Lady Gaga Outfit or Landfill Trash?2/18/11189
Seeking Happily Ever After...2/14/1145
In Honor of Feb 14th...2/10/1152
Bull Jumps Into the Crowd2/6/1142
Where Does 666 Come From?1/31/11161
Guns1/25/11102
More Pictures1/20/1169
One of the Strangest Days I've Ever Had1/17/11122
The Worst Football Team Ever To (fill in the blank)1/12/11362
The Greatest of Face Replace1/10/1192
Southern Hospitality1/4/1152
Numbers12/28/10120
Wacky Symbols12/23/1083
Over-the-Top Propaganda Posters12/19/1081
Birthday Olympics12/14/10105
Catching Up12/9/1069
Jesus is a Jerk12/3/10217
States of Confusion11/20/1077
VooDoo Donut11/18/10110
Checkerboard National Parks11/15/1096
Dead Squirrel Note11/10/1055
Halloween 2010 - Upside Down Man11/2/10161
Fortune10/13/1049
The Backin' Up Song10/8/1058
My Fave Five Inspirational Animal Posters9/29/10432
GIF of the Day9/22/1073
More Bars In More Places9/13/1062
You Down With?9/3/1065
Captcha8/30/1058
Hacked8/25/1083
Holiday Graph8/17/1079
Andre the Giant8/12/10328
Beard Cage with Working Beard Door8/7/1061
What the Hell Is This? (part 3)8/2/1078
How Texting Is Ruining Changing English7/28/1064
When Warcraft Meets Social Media Sites7/19/1062
I'm in the Facebook Movie Trailer7/17/1060
My Super Fun Tour of a Medical Marijuana Dispensary7/14/1049
Does the BBC Website's Region Map Look Like a Swastika?7/6/1074
Happy 4th of July!7/2/1044
World Cup: Soccer Power Rankings by GNP Ranking6/25/10133
I've Got a Scammer6/22/1065
34 Ridiculous Road Signs6/11/10145
New Blog: Average Guy Goes To... (Venice Beach)6/7/1097
Michael Jordan Rocks a Hitler Mustache...?6/1/1091
8 Accidentally Inappropriate Company Logos5/25/10203
8 Accidentally Inappropriate Company Logos (ReDirect)5/25/1033
Man Diagram5/18/1067
Playboy Mansion Plan B5/13/1095
JURY DUTY - Detention for Adults5/10/1093
Angry Turtle5/7/1061
7 Messed-Up Early Versions of Fairy Tales5/4/10314
Lobster Rage Fist5/1/1057
Conspiracy Nut4/28/1056
5 Accidentally Hilarious Things Happening in the Background of Newscasts4/25/10169
Crashing An Orgo Final4/21/1072
Barely a Bear4/19/1037
Why You Don't Bring Your Chat Room On A Date4/15/1041
The Jessies, 20104/14/1044
Switzerland, 902104/12/1049
Viral Pixels4/8/1040
Helen Keller Falls Off Stage3/31/1058
Big-Ass Easter Eggs: A Gallery3/29/10180
10 Epic Pranks3/17/10240
5 Saints Who Had Absolutely Nothing To Do With What They're Known For3/15/10131
Century Map - Final!3/11/1043
It has begun...3/10/1043
Century Squared3/9/1072
BluKillWhiteMarlIbuTunaTroutSaLobsteRimp3/8/10206
The 5 Best Auto Tunes3/1/1053
wtfOMG (and other things Korean kids are learning about English)2/25/1038
Triceracopter2/23/1024
5 Sports That Were ALMOST Winter Olympic Events2/21/1071
Natty Light2/17/1039
Ask Dr. Scientist #2: Will Humans Be As Tall As Avatars Someday?2/15/1061
10 Creative Valentine's Dates2/10/10103
Wow, My Date Sucked!2/9/1078
5 Racist Superbowl Ads2/6/1043
Enormous Slip N Slides: A Gallery2/1/10211
Adrian Peterson Figurine; NFL Overtime Rules1/29/1042
Lil Wayne Totally Looks Like Captain Jack Sparrow1/27/1096
Jewelry1/25/1048
It's Hailing in Los Angeles Right Now1/22/1058
Little Kids Re-enact "Jersey Shore"1/20/1031
What the Heck Is This (part 2)1/15/1047
Hitler Finds Out About Northwestern's Outback Bowl Loss1/12/1062
The "I Hate L.A." Mix1/11/10163
Archives Updated1/5/1040
13 Legendary Store Name Puns1/4/10340
How To Turn Your House Into A Bar1/1/10138
Skymall Stupid Lawn Ornament Tourney - The Aliens Have It!12/30/09158
Product Placement Everywhere12/28/09140
The Twelve Days of Guy Gifts - Part 4: Recreational Toys12/24/09143
The Twelve Days of Guy Gifts - Part 3: Gadgets (with videos!)12/23/0957
The Twelve Days of Guy Gifts - Part 2: Weapons12/22/09149
The Twelve Days of Guy Gifts - Part 1: Giant Stuff12/21/09136
Ask Dr. Scientist #1: Can I Live Like a Vampire?12/17/09133
Awesome History 2: The 4th Crusade12/14/09189
Birthday12/11/0965
Evil Christmas Carols12/9/0940
Northwestern Lifts Its 9-Year Boycott of Outback Steakhouse12/6/0974
My Favorite Porn Movie Titles11/27/09105
Happy Thanksgiving!11/25/09182
Me vs. The Raccoon11/23/0994
My Text Conversation With a Stranger11/19/09140
7 Things You Can Buy For the Price of the New Aston Martin One-7711/16/09104
12 Awesome Palindromes11/12/09112
The Ten Biggest Misconceptions We Learn In School11/10/091,183
17 Awesome Captchas11/9/09130
Theo's Board11/5/09129
13 T-Shirts That Will Get You Beat Up By the Cops11/2/09139
Video of the Day - Halloween Prank10/31/0975
12 Strange Sexy Halloween Costumes10/30/09247
Why Would You Want This Dog Back?10/28/09136
Tournament For Life10/26/0951
Awesome History #1: Paul Revere's Ride10/23/09137
Jesus Wins! (at Twitter, at least)10/22/0976
Holy Shit, It's Moving!10/21/09105
Ten Times Twitter Actually Makes Sense10/16/09321
"Chunder" and 15 Other Beautiful Ways To Say "Lose Your Lunch"10/15/0988
The 10 Stupidest Things People Have Named Their Kids (Dirty Version)10/14/0989
The 10 Stupidest Things People Have Changed Their Names To10/13/09452
The 20 Stupidest Things People Have Named Their Kids10/12/09128
3 More Ways to Say "Boning"10/9/09123
Drag Racing10/1/09101
My Trapeze Lesson9/30/0969
Lost and Found9/29/09138
10 Amazing Translation Parties9/16/0955
Pictures from Minnesota9/15/0971
23 Photos of People Right After Being Hit in the Nuts9/14/09136
1,000,000 Views!9/11/0973
What a Fire-Hydrant-Burst Looks Like9/10/09248
Photograph of Another Bird9/8/0957
LeAnn Rimes Is On My Softball Team9/6/09142
Fifteen Ridiculous Car Mods9/4/09291
Misconception Quiz9/3/0950
Misconception Quiz Answers9/2/0951
Skymall Stupidest Lawn Ornament Tourney - Round 18/31/09293
Link of the Day - Daaaamn8/26/0972
Paulspond Back In Time8/25/0956
Who Wants Some Latvian Money?8/24/09279
24 Things Every Guy Has Done8/21/09125
The 5 Worst Superpower Combos8/19/09225
Video of the Day - PowerThirst8/17/0987
Mad Men: 5 Strangest Cast Member Previous Roles8/15/09231
Dennis Rodman Rejects Me8/13/0960
Pic of the Day - Roof Penis8/12/0977
The Next Funniest 20 Vanity License Plates Online8/10/09144
The Funniest 20 Vanity License Plates Online8/8/09269
Video of the Day - Unnecessary Censorship Sesame Street Edition8/6/0979
Tosh.0 - Part 28/4/0983
5 Stupid Facts About Money8/3/09205
10 Things the Spinning Beach Ball of Death SHOULD Be7/31/09132
I'm Going On Tosh.0 on Thursday7/29/0963
Meat and Abortion on Mille Lacs7/28/0998
10 Most WTF Google Maps Mashups7/27/09226
Unfortunate Sticker Placement #2767/25/0973
Link of the Day - ManBabies7/24/0971
5 Video Game Moves I Wish I Could Do In Real Life7/22/09145
A Basic Girl Graph7/20/0959
The 5 Hugest Beer Pong Games of All Time7/17/09658
Link of the Day: Garfield Minus Garfield7/16/09139
10 Unintentionally Hilarious License Plates7/15/09463
Manolith7/14/09116
The Shark Throwing Lumberjack7/13/09213
The 7 Worst Jobs At Auschwitz (an actually serious post)7/9/091,065
The 7 Worst Ways To Die At Auschwitz (an actually serious post)7/7/095,291
4D of July7/6/09233
Jurys of the Apocalypse7/4/0992
The Manliest Picture of All Time7/3/0962
Pic of the Day - So Much Awesome7/1/0971
Wienermobile Sighting!6/30/09188
Video of the Day - Drunk History6/29/0989
Pic of the Day - Zorch Everywhere6/28/0962
Super Zorch 26/27/0969
American MeatHeads In Europe - Epilogue6/26/09180
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 96/25/09206
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 86/24/09125
American MeatHeads In Europe - Days 5-76/23/09188
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 46/20/09103
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 36/19/09146
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 26/18/09134
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 16/17/09317
American MeatHeads In Europe - Day 06/16/0993
Off to Russia! (and Sweden) (and Finland)6/15/0960
Paul and Sam vs. the NBA All-Star Game6/13/0970
Link of the Day - Ultra-Condensed Books6/12/0980
Pic of the Day - Musician Meet-up6/10/0968
Real Buddy Roll Call6/8/09135
Pic of the Day - Mr. Brain's6/5/0972
Where in the World Should We Go? Part 46/4/09155
What's the Opposite of a Sausage Fest?6/2/092,500
Genius of the Month: First Names That Are Colors6/1/0994
Genius of the Month: Last Names That Are Colors5/29/09163
What I've Been Up To – Part 4: No More Break5/28/0953
What I've Been Up To – Part 3: KFC5/28/0982
What I've Been Up To – Part 2: Click It or Ticket5/27/0980
What I've Been Up To – Part 1: Castrol5/26/0980
Super Zorch5/25/0980
The Best 20 Cereals. Period.5/21/09150
Video of the Day - The SFW NSFW Video5/20/09102
LA Bans Fast Food in South Central5/19/0962
Where in the World Should We Go? Part 35/18/0985
Where in the World Should We Go? Part 25/15/0981
Shark Suplex5/13/09142
Where in the World Should We Go? Part 15/12/09116
12 Unfortunately Burned Out Signs5/11/09644
Pic of the Day - South Bay Evite5/9/0996
Awesomely Strange Google Trends - Follow-Up5/7/09109
10-Foot Bacon Jesus5/6/09160
10 Awesomely Strange Google Trends5/4/091,186
Sparkling Wiggles5/3/09206
Link of the Day - Little Girl Blog Launch5/1/0976
The Chuck Norris Wagon Train Banana Dream4/30/0986
The Haircut Dream4/29/0967
Pic of the Day - Evil Dentist4/28/09104
Celebrity Chipotle4/27/09102
Slow-Motion Laughing Babies4/24/09191
The Mystery Poop4/23/09208
Pic of the Day - What's Wrong With This Picture?4/22/0996
Six-and-a-Half Funny Ugly Babies4/20/09278
Google Pot Favorite Strains4/20/0969
Link of the Day - Spiders on Drugs4/17/09113
The Snuggie's Retarded Brother4/15/09113
Easter Follow-up4/14/09149
Watch a Bunch of 29-Year-Olds Crawl Over Each Other to Get Easter Eggs4/13/0967
'Funky Cold Medina' and 'Wild Thing' are the Same Song4/10/092,567
I Heart 8mpg4/9/09142
Video of Me Blowing a Stop Sign4/8/09122
Fortune Cookie4/7/0969
The Post That Got Me Banned4/6/09290
What's New on Paulspond?4/5/09213
Why Paulspond Went on Hiatus4/4/0993
Paul's Pond Relaunches Monday!4/3/0980
Five Cartoon Characters Who Look Like Pedophiles12/27/0787
Holy Shit Do I Need a New Passport12/23/07146
Three Vignettes About Moving Into a New Home12/21/0793
Rants12/19/0774
Origami Boulder12/10/0769
The Next Evolution of the Romance Novel11/23/0788
My Will - PS11/11/0765
My Will11/9/07109
Angry Vomiting Pumpkins11/2/07151
Dear China: Give Us Back Our Damn Camera10/31/07109
Venice Photo Tour!10/29/0790
Graph of Paul and Gabe's Homecoming Weekend10/21/0768
Chicago Weekend Down in Flames, Part 210/18/0762
Babies vs. Avocados10/12/07182
Marshmallows10/10/0768
My Letter To Verizon Customer Support10/8/07271
Dear Passengers of United Flight 233: I'm Sorry For All the Vomiting10/8/07260
How To Recycle Batteries10/7/07126
Turbo Prop10/1/0782
Context9/25/0749
Mascot Rematch 29/24/0768
Mascot Rematch 19/23/0762
Mascot Death Matches9/22/07127
Tire Changing and Other Tests of Manliness9/17/0764
Two Unexpected Downsides of Moving into a New House9/11/07103
I Hate Moving9/7/0770
The New House9/3/0756
Wedding Horror8/31/0762
And^58/28/0745
Buffalo^88/27/0784
Indy Fever Part 2 - Fairs8/23/07163
Indy Fever Part 1 - Weddings8/20/0768
Yard Games8/13/07123
Wax + Carpet = A Domestic Skill I Never Thought I'd Need8/8/07119
Post Bridge-Collapse Minneapolis Traffic Still Better than LA Traffic8/1/07180
Can a White Man Still Be President?7/27/07196
This Past Weekend's Schedule:7/20/0736
Cabin7/18/07139
Eat Your Way Out of Something7/6/0772
Bear-Hunter-Princess7/3/07102
Excuse Me While I Rant6/29/07181
Undesirable6/25/07135
Trader Joe's Water: The ONLY Water6/21/07198
Foot --> Mouth6/18/0764
The Dog-Shit Excuse6/15/07109
The Three Silliest Dreams I've Ever Had6/13/07181
My Radioactive Cow Dream (with pictures!)6/10/07106
Choking Hazard6/7/07161
Douche-Baggery: Exhibit #16/6/0756
Ron's BAC5/27/07143
The Five-Minute Mile 25/23/0750
PS - May5/18/0740
Genius of the Month TM - May5/17/0752
Q and A5/15/07118
Genius of the Month TM Contest - May5/14/0739
The Five-Minute Mile5/11/0753
Presidential Physical Fitness Event #5: The Mile Run5/9/0795
Heaven/Hell Biking5/6/0758
Tri 25/3/0766
Broken Printer4/19/0755
Venne Week4/15/0758
Marlboro Mask3/30/0748
Airport Rant3/17/07158
Paintball (aka The Art of Getting the Crap Shot Out of Me)3/17/07117
WHO Cites WHAT, NOBODY, BIRDFLU as Possible Contributors to Birdflu3/6/0764
Random Words2/23/0766
Euginia's Story2/1/07111
My Gay Date1/28/07109
Waterless Toilets1/17/0773
Super Happy Fun Shooter12/27/06125
Notes on the IdiOlympics - Part 312/13/0677
Side Notes on the IdiOlympics - Part 112/11/0640
Side Notes on the IdiOlympics - Part 212/11/0646
Spam12/8/0692
Car Ghetto-ness11/21/0675
Winkelwagentjes Cart Joust11/15/0673
Do Your 15 Minutes of Fame Count If They're In The Netherlands?11/15/0681
Line Rider11/14/06114
Ugly Babies - The Revenge11/10/06126
Oh, the Huge Manatee!11/9/06127
Hollyween11/5/0666
Parking Ticket11/2/0680
Voicemail Auditions (part 3)10/30/0635
Voicemail Auditions (part 2)10/27/0652
Voicemail auditions10/25/0651
Dickies10/20/0646
Mules10/18/0635
Our New Website10/16/0659
A Haiku (because I've got nothing else to write about)10/12/0650
Genius of the MonthTM Runners-Up10/8/0685
Genius of the MonthTM Award Winner10/7/0669
Americanians10/6/0644
Genius of the MonthTM Award x210/6/0640
BAS-TARDs10/4/0636
Godmother9/28/0660
Giant Blueberries9/26/0677
Reno9/25/0653
Gun Case9/23/0646
Never Too Good For Some Engrish9/21/0668
Property Management with a Sense of Humor9/18/06104
Bodies in a Study Room9/14/0651
Warranty9/12/0662
Three Year Coincidence: Imposter, RIP9/9/0649
Failure Defined9/7/0649
New Roommate... Again9/6/0649
Totalling Totals9/3/0650
Cavities9/1/0652
Back in CA (after offending everyone in MN)8/28/0639
Top Rated Weddings8/28/0641
Pluto Got 'Moted8/26/0648
All Your Snakes Are Belong To Us8/25/0632
Representative Places8/24/0652
Phone a Friend8/22/0643
Drunk at Wedding8/21/0643
Watermelons8/18/0647
Wombats on a Moped8/17/0640
Snakes on a Plane8/16/0639
Celebrity Sighting...8/14/0664
Long Lost Johnny Green Message8/13/0649
BTW8/12/0632
Timeline O' Jobs8/10/0657
Kicked Out8/9/0643
Brian's Wedding8/8/0652
Sherwyn-Williams8/7/0675
Things I'm Good At (by percentile rank)8/5/0640
House of Wax8/2/0646
Back8/1/0644
Website Reconstruction7/27/0634
Last Day of Security7/24/0676
Mail Order Camera7/22/0631
Caste Party7/20/0646
Patriotic Pattern Recognition7/19/0659
The Things I Do For My Art7/17/0676
Credit Where Credit Is Due7/11/0656
4th of July Follow-up 2 - 10 BEST STATES7/10/0681
4th of July Follow-up7/9/0657
Our Shot At Maxim7/7/0665
Sociology Experiment... Results7/6/0680
Sociology Experiment... involving a mattress7/2/06196
Worst Pick-Up Line Ever6/30/0637
Security Nap6/28/0642
One More Reason For LA To Grow a Mass-Transit System6/27/0624
Beef Jerky6/23/0633
Hershey Travel: Not So Sweet6/21/0667
Soldier Homecoming6/19/0633
Random Acts of Kindness... Random Acts of Creepiness6/18/0655
The Skymall Game: Giftshop Version6/15/0677
Hard Plastic Product Coating: I Hate You So Much6/13/0662
10th Plane Flight in 15 Days6/12/0646
Hershey6/9/0632
Epic Weekend part 26/8/0628
Epic Weekend part 16/7/0649
More Hershey6/6/0634
Black Guy and White Guy (Response)6/3/0684
Alex vs. Peter Griffin6/1/0673
Alex: Released Into The Wild5/27/0643
Uhaul5/26/0647
Play Pics5/25/0650
Show's Down5/22/0645
YOU'VE GOT TO BE HERE TO ENJOY THIS!5/21/0643
Show's Up5/15/0649
Sharkeez Burned Down!5/11/0668
4 days... 60 bucks...5/6/0662
Broken Parking Meters5/3/0644
Cat Lipstick4/29/06107
Speak-and-Type4/28/0636
Not Normal4/25/0649
Airplane Proposal4/22/0637
Easter in New York4/19/0652
You're An All-Star4/16/0655
Goddamn Eyelashes4/12/0638
Video of Me Hurling a Cell Phone Against a Brick Wall4/10/0658
Flip Cup Tournament4/8/0663
Too Much Time On My Hands4/5/0641
Almost 04/05/064/4/0635
Casting Call (part 2)4/3/0634
I'll Start Posting More. Promise.3/30/0662
Are You Smarter Than Vince Young?3/27/0637
Nine Stages3/25/0625
My Brother Alex's Response...3/23/0631
Subway vs. McDonalds3/18/0650
Casting Call3/13/0630
Why Are Streets Named "Crescent" and "Lane" and Stuff?3/7/0628
The Coolest Club in Hollywood3/6/06106
Imaginary Number Adendum2/28/0659
Imaginary Numbers2/27/0651
Genius of the MonthTM Award - February2/26/0667
What Happens When Your Car Gets Eaten By A 20-Foot-Tall Snowplow?2/23/0642
Muy Bueno Copier2/21/0698
ZZyzx2/18/0657
Car Themed Post #4 - Driveway Cops2/15/0634
Juxtapositions of the Weekend2/12/0642
Superbowl 5K - A Hilarious Exercise in Race-ism - Part 32/8/0635
Superbowl 5K - A Hilarious Exercise in Race-ism – Part 22/7/0671
Superbowl 5K - A Hilarious Exercise in Race-ism - Part 12/6/0661
LUV 4 MY SNIZZ2/4/0647
Alpacas2/3/0660
Carl's Jr: We're Out of Soft Drinks2/2/0644
Yes, I Still Live in L.A.1/31/0662
Skiing vs. Snowboarding1/30/06111
FLIRT1/28/0645
Ski Trip1/26/0650
Car Themed Post #2 - Airport Self-Drop/Ski Trip Prologue1/24/0650
I Stole Terrell Davis' Overhead Compartment1/23/0642
Car Themed Post #1 - Car vs. Pizza Hut1/21/0652
Outburst Birth Control1/20/0641
Golf Trip1/18/0640
It's Called a "Decanter"1/10/0647
What the Heck is This Thing Called?1/9/0644
Drunk Shuttles and Hijacked Limos1/1/0629
Another Year12/31/0540
The Sign Game - Round 5 (Final Round!)12/24/0565
The Sign Game - Round 412/23/0574
The Sign Game - Round 312/22/0576
The Sign Game - Round 212/21/0563
The Sign Game - Round 112/20/0550
Stuff Nobody Else Would Do12/19/0537
Double Traffic12/16/0538
Words That Suck Ass12/15/0540
Words That Are Cool12/14/0553
Johnny Green's Response to the Test Triathalon Post...12/13/0545
Standardized Test Triathlon (or: How I Broke My Brain)12/12/0527
More Fun With Pennies12/8/0547
Surprise Trip to Minnesota12/6/0559
Interest on Pennies (pun intended)12/5/0543
Pennies12/2/0540
Thanksgiving Quintathalon11/30/0570
Turkey Smuggling11/29/0544
Addendum to Leftovers Post11/27/0538
Jury Duty11/22/0547
Leftovers11/21/0544
PBR11/18/0553
El Cholo (That's Spanish for "THE Cholo")11/17/0568
Delta Airlines Vs. Paul's Way of Life11/15/0549
Body Paint Anagrams11/15/0560
Surveys11/10/0568
Free Razor11/9/0549
More Costume Ideas11/7/0562
Costume Ideas11/4/0545
Book Smarts, Street Smarts11/2/0538
Jenn's Ass10/31/0556
Lobby Ambassador10/30/0560
BTW10/28/0557
Snake v. Alligator10/26/0557
Monster-Epic Ballads10/25/05143
How the Months Got Their Names10/24/0549
Responses to Hair Post; Month Post10/23/0543
Sky Mall10/21/05104
Months10/20/0536
Juxtaposition10/17/0578
Airplane Trail Mix10/14/0545
Fast Fast Food Post10/13/0553
Hair's Your Post10/11/0550
Speaking of Phone Quirks...10/10/0532
T9Word... Out of Control10/9/0559
T9Word Foiled10/7/0537
T9Word Challenge10/5/0554
T9Word Story10/4/0562
House Phone10/2/0540
My New Favorite Gemstone9/30/0530
Mysterious Streets part 29/29/0544
The Mysterious Streets of Redondo Beach9/27/0555
Student Truck Drivers9/26/0555
There is Officially a Website for Everything9/24/0528
Sam's Elevator9/22/0557
Ilana9/20/0553
Modern Convenience9/19/0526
We've done it!9/16/0554
Two Years in L.A.9/15/0531
Claw Hammer9/13/0558
My Fortune9/11/0533
Stripfest Pictures!9/9/05101
Electrical Surge9/6/0541
How Horses Get Preggers9/5/0524
Family Picture9/5/0559
What Happens When I Have Too Much Time On My Hands At Security9/1/0536
Last Chicago Post, Promise8/30/0568
Stop or Not a Stop8/29/0566
Scootskate Eulogy8/27/0566
Death of the Scootskate8/25/0561
I Killed a Pigeon8/24/05105
Recap8/23/0545
I Almost Saw a Guy Get Stabbed8/22/0556
Old Style Nintendo8/21/0567
Teaser/Chicago Post 18/19/0549
Song Lyrics as Bullet Lists8/15/0556
One More Picture8/13/0549
Last Idaho Post8/10/0569
Not Another Idaho Trip Post8/9/0547
Barter8/8/0544
Idaho Trip part 5 - Don't Make Fun of Rupert8/8/05108
Idaho Trip part 3 - Lava Hot Springs8/4/0573
Idaho Trip part 2 - Golden Spike8/3/0560
Idaho Trip part 1 - 48-State Nostalgia8/2/0573
What Would Jesus Drive?7/26/0550
Helpful Information To Any Web Stalkers I Might Have7/18/0525
Song Lyric Bullet Lists 27/17/0570
Own3d, again7/14/0530
A Few Pictures From the Cabin7/14/0566
Random7/11/0540
Speaking of cars...7/11/0553
4th of July Recap... in Pictures!7/9/0571
Ultimate Beerpong7/8/0550
Blueberry Juice7/7/0581
Idaho Trip part 4 - Craters and Atomic Power7/6/0543
Stella's Groove vs. Raccoons7/5/0534
How to Go About Killing a Lion With Your Bare Hands7/3/0558
TiVo7/1/0558
Good Day6/28/0534
My First Shooting6/27/0571
Cambodian Midgets Lion Fight6/24/0560
I Slept Until 9pm6/24/0544
Summer Is Upon Me6/23/0539
Statistics6/21/0543
My First Earthquake6/19/05100
Observations on Wheels - part 36/17/0565
Porn Truck6/16/0570
Observations on Wheels - part 26/16/0571
Observations on Wheels - part 16/15/0544
Vegas6/13/0552
Off To Las Vegas6/9/0531
Noah's Nudist Phase6/8/0542
Beer Voices6/7/0541
Best Search Hits - Gaining Stability..6/6/0549
Customer Service6/4/0547
Final Referral Post6/2/0553
More Entertaining Websites That Aren't Mine5/30/0541
Stupid Chemistry Names5/29/0547
Incidental Comic Porn5/27/05243
Speaking of Which...5/26/0546
Donkey Balls5/25/0582
8-Year-Olds In Our Bushes5/23/0549
Wendy's Chili Finger5/19/0553
Old Country Punking5/17/0543
Fucking Door5/15/0561
Genius of the MonthTM5/12/0547
SAT Stumper5/10/0574
Barely a Musical5/9/0580
Husband of the Year5/5/0543
Whole Fish Plate5/3/0559
Termite Carnival5/2/0581
One Upped4/28/0544
...Which Reminds Me...4/28/0527
My Current Desktop Background4/26/0554
Gross Cups4/25/0548
Return to Fraternity Life4/24/0562
Untitled Formulaic Teen Sex Comedy4/21/05104
Pope Odds4/20/0538
Taco Bell Challenge4/8/0537
Return of the Smile4/7/0531
Christian Science4/2/0587
Weekend Mayhem4/2/0554
Best Search Hits - March4/2/0527
Nick and Angie3/8/0553
Lost Hat3/5/0555
Best Search Hits - February3/2/0539
New York2/22/0577
Off to NY; New Record2/18/0561
April's Couch2/17/0553
April's Cooler2/16/0542
Knock-off Knock-off Oatmeal2/15/0574
Restocking2/13/0562
High Speed Chase2/11/05119
Weekend2/9/05124
Losing A Car2/7/0542
Gaining A Car 22/6/0581
Gaining A Car2/5/05132
Best Search Hits - January/More Car Stuff2/3/0571
The Quest To Fill The Spacemobile Hole2/1/0557
Guest Post - Mark1/30/0543
...Still In Mourning1/27/0535
The Spacemobile Is Dead1/23/0571
It's Over1/22/0538
Pictures from the Gay Bar1/19/0540
A Weekend1/17/0535
Rain in LA1/15/0554
Of course...1/13/0541
The Magnum1/12/0559
Guest Post - Kolleen1/11/0535
Gay Bar1/9/0533
This Is Why I Don't Drive On Fridays1/8/0549
Best Search Hits - December1/6/0546
Own3d1/5/0571
Happy New Year1/3/0548
NYG12/31/0477
2004 - A Year's Best Pictures12/30/04169
Catching Up - Pictures12/29/0470
Catching Up12/27/0464
Ski Trip Recap Part 2: A Dog Ate My Cell Phone12/21/0462
Anticipation12/19/0440
Ski Trip Recap Part 1: Sick, Sick, Sick12/19/0440
Photoshop Challenge #412/18/0474
Supersecurity12/16/0438
I Know I Never Write About Media, But…12/15/0434
Everything Comin' Up Roses12/13/0434
Or maybe...12/12/0457
My Birthday12/11/0451
Comments on Photoshop Challenge #312/10/0474
Photoshop Challenge #312/8/0462
In'N'Out12/7/0457
The Masses (and their transit system)12/6/0442
...and the Spacemobile broke down. Again.12/5/0457
Best Search Hits - Miscellaneous12/3/0452
Best Search Hits - November12/2/0437
Random Numbers12/1/0436
Wish I Had 10 More Megs of Server Space...11/28/0443
Highest-Paid Security Guard EVER11/27/0442
Top 10 Modifications I'd Make To The Spacemobile11/26/0454
Pimp My Spacemobile11/25/0443
My Big Turquoise Bed11/23/0447
Guest Post11/22/0435
Drawer of Death11/20/0485
Yankee Doodles11/19/0452
DDR PS11/17/0453
DDR11/16/0481
East Coast Trip11/15/0465
Burning! Burning!11/13/0440
Statue Add-On Add-On11/10/0451
Statue Add-On11/7/04100
Statue11/4/0462
Best Search Hits - October11/2/0471
Halloween Party10/31/0438
Samurai Weapons10/30/0475
Spackling for Security Deposits10/29/0461
Resolved - Ticket Issue #209847031210/28/0451
Welcome Home Computer!10/25/0451
Allied Chem Dry10/20/0452
PS Johnny10/19/0442
D.P.P.P.S. (Dirty Pop Party Post-Script)10/17/0431
Dirty Pop Party10/16/04113
Assless Chaps10/13/0433
Computerless10/12/0455
Johnny Green's Visit (part 4)10/10/0443
Beer and Pizza10/9/0468
PBR10/6/0449
Johnny Green's Visit (part 3), and a Story10/4/0498
Johnny Green's Visit (part 2)10/3/0447
Johnny Green's Visit (part 1)10/2/0444
September's Best Search Hits/Visitors...9/28/0450
Disastrous Trip9/27/0438
Here We Go Again...9/26/0448
Northwestern Bar Night (and more Chalupa debate)9/25/0466
The Rematch. Can Gordita Pull Through?9/23/0438
How?9/21/0464
More on the Gordita vs. Chalupa Showdown9/20/0498
Musical Theater and T-Bell9/19/0464
Pay Toilets9/17/0481
One Year Anniversary9/15/0434
Stripfest9/11/0447
How You Found Me, Part 29/9/0441
The 24-Hour Schedule9/6/0480
Parking Meter Mishaps9/5/0465
Yoshinoya9/4/0441
3 Dollar Paycheck9/2/0457
What I Do At My New Security Job9/1/0456
Things I Might Have Done Thursday8/30/0460
Skunking8/29/04113
Work Schedule8/27/0446
We Came, We Saw, We Punched a Trolley8/17/0477
My Toe Hurts8/15/0456
Moving In...8/14/0457
Moving Out...8/13/0439
It's Sam's Birthday Party8/7/0453
Razor Sharp Fins8/6/0442
Employment Mayhem 2 - The Revenge8/5/0480
Broke-Ass Phone8/4/0466
You Know You Have a Problem When...8/3/0452
Camping 28/2/0476
Countdown8/1/0433
The System7/27/0436
The Fall of Productivity7/25/0449
AVP7/22/0431
For the Love of God7/17/0440
Bear vs. Trampoline7/13/0452
Malibu7/12/0460
Dodgeball7/11/0434
The Sad News...7/8/0435
Happy 4th7/4/0448
Eureka!7/2/0483
Vegas 36/30/0455
Vegas 26/29/04110
It Continues6/27/0441
IT HAS BEGUN!!!6/25/0473
Back in Body, Not in Mind6/23/0440
The Scorching Eye of Ra The Sun God6/14/0475
Vacation!6/3/0485
Diligence6/2/0465
Securitata!5/31/0448
Flaming Line Dunk Contest5/30/0469
Catching Up5/29/0447
How You Found Me5/25/0458
Marathon Pix5/23/0454
Gas5/18/0444
Sumptuous Dentistry5/13/0456
At Least I Know One Thing5/10/0447
How to Sell an Out-of-State Car in California5/8/0463
Car Stew5/6/0452
Romance Novel Quiz5/1/0448
Win this Spacemobaby4/25/0464
Car Set-Ups4/24/0470
Triathlon P.S.4/20/0469
Free Treadmill for the Masses4/19/04183
Triathlon4/18/04134
Security Guard of the Month4/9/0484
Paul and Gabe Go Camping4/2/04114
Meathead Pandemonium (Part 2)3/28/0455
Meathead Pandemonium (Part 1)3/27/0440
Indian Giving3/26/0453
HugeFrown.com; Razing Arizona3/24/0466
How Paulspond.com Got Its Name3/23/04136
Passion of the Criggety3/22/04101
Wholesale Bliss3/15/0459
Sam's Club, Then the Downward Plunge3/12/04105
Biking, Biking, Everywhere3/7/0492
My Neck Hurts3/4/0463
Dueling Diatribes2/29/0464
McTriathlon2/26/0482
Man Vs. Beast 22/23/04173
Catty Midget Bitches2/22/04132
Why Johnny Can't Read2/20/0450
All Roads Lead To The Hood2/18/04100
Ocean 1, Gabe and Paul 02/14/0469
Paulina Employment Pandemonium2/12/0472
7AM SORE-THUMB SURFING2/11/0442
WEEK 21... and so on...2/10/0461
Week 202/3/04117
Week 191/28/04121
Week 181/21/04103
Week 17 (Year 2)1/14/04136
20041/7/04112
Week 161/3/04136
2003 in Review (sort of)12/31/0347
Week 1512/21/0350
Week 1412/14/0350
Week 13.512/10/03207
Week 1312/7/03114
Week 1211/30/0344
Week 1111/23/03120
Week 1011/17/0379
Week 911/10/03138
Week 811/3/0381
Week 710/28/03121
Week 610/21/0367
Week 510/14/03161
Week 410/7/0372
Week 39/30/0343
Week 29/23/03117
Week 19/17/03103

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